When Christianity Died

When I was younger I was introduced to the philosophy that all religions are basically the same. Having met Christ in a personal way as a young adult, I refused to accept this. However, this philosophy seemed to be the prevailing thought everywhere. For instance, I was at a local Catholic retreat and one of the speakers was a life insurance salesman. He explained that at his work he sells the same thing others do but in a different package. He then related his work to how religion is. In response to the philosophy, I discovered answers in the culture of Catholic Apologetics. I found a community that helped me to argue against this. On the other hand, even though I had the right answers, I discovered I was living no different than what the other religions offered. Consequently, the philosophy that I rejected was the same one that I was personally living, I just wasn’t aware of it.

All major religions of the world offer in some way how to live right, a moralism. In the moralism that I experienced I learned how to be a good Catholic, a conservative Catholic. A conservative Catholic is one that is in all the right groups and accepts all the right teachings.  Some, like I was, can be really good at conservatism. I did my best to excel in what conservativism offered. I became an apologist and even went on to finish my graduate studies at one of the most conservative Catholic colleges in the US. The problem with all these positive things is that my faith was on the verge of death. I was very good at my religion but in the end, I had nothing different to offer in terms of what other religions were offering.

At some point, I began to recall an experience that I had of Jesus Christ. This happened at a shrine to St. Photios. I walked into this shrine and it was like walking into another world. Christ was there and He showed me that there was so much more to experience of Him in this life. He showed me that my faith in him was reduced to basically trying to be a good person, a good Catholic. He showed me where my Christianity died. I had been deceived. I had all the right answers, the right teachings, the right groups and ideas, but I did not have Him. Thankfully, in discovering Byzantine spirituality I had found where I went wrong, specifically in the tradition of Hesychasm. The fathers of my tradition showed me that right belief is not a bunch of ideas that provide a right way of living, which is pretty much what all religions offer. Instead, right belief is an experience. It is an encounter with Christ and right living is growing in that experience. The fathers showed me that Christianity is not moralism, it’s an encounter.  It’s an encounter that we are called to share with others.

According to fathers ,we are not a religion of moral ideas that shares these ideas with the world. We are a religion of encounter that shares the encounter with the world. As I said to someone once, right belief is not some kind of dead principles or guidelines set up so we can do the right thing. Real Christian belief is an experience of God and right living is growing and sharing that experience. In my case, it was an act of grace that rescued me from moralism. As someone who has been rescued I see it everywhere. It dominates the churches of today and is killing what can be known of real Christianity.  It is my hope in sharing this that others will ask: is my Christianity dead? Am I just living a moralism that helps me to get by, one that is the basic fruit of all religions? Or am I living in such a way so that I can experience more of Christ? Jesus Christ did not die on the cross so that we can be just like all the other religions. He died so that we could become partakers of the divine nature. He died so that we can experience God and so that we can continue to grow in that experience. If we are not living in a way as to experience more of Him we have missed the very essence of what it means to be a Christian.

God is not interested in what moralism offers. Moralism produces good people, it does not produce saints. He is interested in people who want to know and experience Him, who want to become saints. Moralism says you have to be a good person to be a saint. As the moralistic saying goes, “God helps those who help themselves”. This is the lie that creates the framework for how people understand the Church today. In contrast, God says while we were still sinners Christ died for us. No matter what we have done or where we come from God has invited us through Christ to be reconciled. He knows we might not have what it takes to be that “good person” but instead he wants to give us the power for "being good" at loving Him.